Screeeeeeeeeeeeech. Kerthunk.

A guy driving a Mercedes is talking on his cell phone. He runs a red light and nearly hits a pedestrian. Later, he drives into the woods and crashes into a tree. If nobody else is there, does it make a sound?

George Berkeley, assuming the position that “to see is to be perceived,” would argue that absence of listeners equals absence of sound. I take a more pragmatic view and posit that such an event would make a sound — something along the lines of:

“As I was saying, I’m very important because — aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!”

Screeeeeeeeeeeeech. Kerthunk.

See? Philosophy is easy.

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